Thursday, February 26, 2015

A Different Kind of Miracle

So I went to the doctor the other week and she was talking to me about adoption.  She said, "Adoption is the longest pregnancy ever!" and I didn't think about it before, but it really is!  We have been "paper pregnant" for 13 months and we still do not know who we are meeting.  That really is not a lot of time compare to my doctor.  Her and her husband adopted 2 children from Congo.  The adoption is final and completed, but they have not been able to bring them home and have been trying to get them home for 2 years.  Now that's an even longer pregnancy.  Now that we have an approved home study I feel like we just got a positive pregnancy test and we haven't yet been to the doctor to see if we are having a boy or girl.  I know that sounds silly, but it's kind of where we are in the process.

We just got our official approval e-mail today and now we are on the hunt for our angels.  The way this is working is now that we are approved, we get an e-mail for all the new children going through the system.  After reading their information, if we are interested in the child/children we can inquire.  If not, we just keep waiting.  This is a hard thing for me.  I have to read through what these children have been through and it's heartbreaking.  I wish I could just have them all and hold them all close to me and keep them all safe.  It's hard, but I know God is taking care of those children and I know their foster families are taking great care of them until they find their forever homes.  I also know God is preparing a child/children for us.  We just have to be patient, just as if we were pregnant waiting out 9 months.  We will meet our angels soon :)

It's funny because I get all the same emotions as if I were pregnant.  I know what it feels like to have my heart overflowing with joy and love.  I know what the anticipation of waiting for a child to arrive is like.  I know the excitement of planning a room theme, picking out paint colors, and planning a Baby Welcome Home shower.  It's exciting and scary all at the same time.  You're excited to be parents, but at the same time completely terrified because before you only had yourself and spouse to worry about, but now your going to hold a little life in your hands.  If you mess this kid up, you're responsible! Lol!  You just want to be the best parent you can be for this child.  You just want to love them and hold them and hug them and spoil them with love.  I know all those feelings.  I'm just missing the belly, but ya know, I'm ok with that because I get to be so much more to them.  I'm more than just a belly.

I truly believe the human body is incredible and the things it can do are just amazing.  Birthing a child is an incredible experience and without it I would not be looking for my children right now, but it's not part of my story right now.  Maybe someday, but not today.  My miracle is down a different path. It's a more beautiful path than I could have ever planned for myself.  I am blessed.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

We have been...

February 24th was the day our home study was supposed to be presented to the SNAP board.  Our home study specialist was going to be presenting over the phone.  For anyone who doesn't know, the home study is a HUGE part of adopting and can be a very long process.

We were actually pretty lucky, ours was relatively short (when adopting every single day that passes seems like a lifetime).  Our specialist had our home study completed in December after we started to process at the end of October.  So she moved pretty quickly with us and it was much appreciated!  December quickly passed and so did January with no word on where our home study was or if we had a presentation date.  So after some emailing and talking to a couple different people I finally figured out that there was a delay in our home study.  Our specialist sent it in, but something happened with the email and they weren't able to open the link.  Anyway, long story short we finally got our presentation day, February 24th!  Our specialist presented and we have been....  APPROVED!!!

We are free too inquire about children in foster care and move forward with an adoption!  We are so excited and cannot wait to be parents.  We have been waiting for just over a year now to be to this point and we are so excited that it is finally coming together.  It was actually a year ago on Valentine's Day that Ian and I announced to our families that we were going to be adopting.  Then one year and 10 days later our home study was approved.  It truly is a blessing and we are trusting that God is putting us right where he needs us to be.  I know I do not post about my Faith and beliefs a lot, but I am a spiritual person and I do believe in blessings from God and that everything happens for a reason.  I mean, my entire relationship with my husband was an act of God from the very beginning (that's a fun story I'll get into another time)!  This has truly been as great week for Ian and I though and we are just so thrilled to be one step closer to becoming parents.

 This is a photo that I shared on our adoption page.  The color we have chosen for our baby room is this turquoise-y teal color! Haha! That's the technical name :)  We do not yet know who is going to be occupying this space yet, we do know what theme we are going to be doing and it is very gender neutral.  Once we know who or angel(s) is/are we will add more personal touches to it, but this is definitely going to be a room inspired by daddy!  More photos coming soon!

Monday, February 2, 2015

Special People *Quick Post*

A lot of times, when telling people we are going through the adoption process I hear the phrase, "it take a very special person to adopt, I could never do it".  While I know this is meant to be a compliment, I just don't feel special.  Am I living up to those "adoption parent" standards? I don't know, but what I have learned is that it doesn't take a special person to adopt.  It takes a person who is willing to love unconditionally, fully, all the time, not matter what.  Of course there are other details that go into it and I am aware that this describes a lot of people, but I fully believe that anyone who is willing to open their home and their heart is able to adopt.  Maybe that is what makes them "special people".

I am not saying every family should consider adoption or that it is right for everyone because that's just not the case.  When adopting you really have to think about what is best for the child.  Is your home, schedule, career, lifestyle, etc. right for a child?  It may not be and that is OK!! It doesn't make you any less special, haha! I just believe it's a beautiful thing, that if circumstances are right, it can make for some really beautiful happily ever afters.

Now, like I said before, I do not consider myself to be one of these "special people".  There are so many other people in the world who are far more special than I.  The things that make me feel like adoption is absolutely the path for me is that I have always felt that I have so much love to give.  I feel like my heart is over flowing with love and I just want to share it.  My home is always open to children and I have always been a protector.  I want to protect and support as many children as possible.  They are our future after all!  I also feel like I was meant to be a mother.  I don't know what my other paths in life are going to be or what God has planned for me, but I just know for a fact I want to be and will be a mother.  Of course, I would love to experience giving birth some day, but if my husband and I do not ever conceive and we grow our family through adoption I would not be upset one bit.

Of course, it can be terrifying.  To think that you have this plan for life that includes being pregnant and having babies and then it not happening as planned can be a hard thing to overcome (trust me, I know, I've been there).  But I don't believe that motherhood is all about the giving birth part.  I think it's a very exciting time and a beautiful experience (well maybe not to everyone, haha!), but it's just a small part of being a mother.  There is just so much more that goes into it.  So, this post is for all the "special people" and even not so "special people" who think adoption is a hard thing and not everyone can do it.  Don't let that phrase discourage you.  You can, if you are willing!

This is just a quick post.  I just had to get some thoughts out!